You will make known to me the path of life....

I've been doing a study on Luke by Elizabeth George. Luke has plenty of those hard sayings of Jesus. In recent years I realize I've ignored the tough verses and like to read the gentle and soothing passages. Am I getting soft in my old age? or worse yet, is my faith getting soft? Another thing I've questioned is am I doing anything to further the kingdom? For years I taught my children and others at home and in Sunday school. Due to my health and the fact that the kids are grown, I haven't been doing much of that. I find myself hardening at times at work. Inconvenient phone calls get the cold treatment. Yes, they're salesmen and may be pushy themselves, but I don't need to push back. I wouldn't do that away from the office. Why let myself do it there? I've settled for less because I'm old and tired, it seems. What am I doing now that I didn't then--or should I say what was I doing then that I'm not doing now? I work out of the home is the biggest difference I can see. I do feel rushed and tired from that. But many women work away from home just as many hours or more and still have time to be godly and faithful to the call. My health is worse, but hopefully it will improve with diet. I guess I don't have as much physical energy, but can't God supply what I lack with spiritual energy? I need to slow down and ponder more the scripture I do study and not just rush through to get one more thing done. Right now my Bible time is like a hard rain that runs off without much benefit. I need to take more time and let it gently rain watering my weariness and teaching me again to take time at the Master's feet. Then I'll see more clearly where God wants me in ministry in this changed time of my life. Things are different for me, but they don't have to be negatively so unless I let them. I don't think I will settle for less. I need to take action. I don't need to climb the rockiest cliff to do it. There's plenty to do where I am as I am. I just need to listen and learn again, and then walk every path He shows me, stepping out with joy because I've been well watered. That I can do.